- Sort out order of TODO - Design notes. - Example characters. - Add a bit for players to designate their best friends' so that other players can later claim them as spies. - Add the GM role, and more background - more explicit events. - Consider making 'with GM' the default again. - Example items. - Talk to Morag. - Even better cover. - Princess icons. - Really cool character sheets. - More ficlets. - More background in general. - Better layout, including boxouts and more art. - Investigate cost of custom ring binders (or source of those princess ones) - Invesitgate publishing costs - Move second part of 'Introduction' fluff to top of 'Inspiration' - Remove references to 'event cards' - Move events into the GM section. - Campaign mode. - Add advice on splitting the players up into smaller groups for the gossip segments. - More princess sample names (though maybe the samle princesses will be enough here) - Do at least one full read-through and proof! --------------------------------------------------------------------- Intent: To create a game every month, and sell individualy and as subcription, eventually setting up an imprint. - Finish ppdd - Set up pay-and-download (or maybe this one should be free?) - Set up POD - Create one a month - Need to set up regular artist, with payment. o 1 year - expect to have 10 ready. - Start up the subscription service, got a decent backlog now. - Intend to fulfill 'I want a game like...' requests. --------------------------------------------------------------------- GavKen review: Pretty Princess Death Diary (61/100) This is a game of Machiavellian Princesses competing for the favour of a Prince and using their dowry to try and eliminate all the competition. Upon winning the Princess marries then kills the Prince to claim the throne and the remainder of her dowry. Character Options (11/20) Like the Win a Royal Heart game you are restricted to playing a Princess who is competing for the heart of a Prince and thus accession to the throne. Unlike that game you get a little more control over your character with your own names, choose to allocate virtue points and create your own starting items. This provides a bit more option to the starting character. Your Princess will still be the scheming heartless bitch that the other characters are, but at least you’ll have more style (or so you think). Mechanics (13/20) The mechanics of the game revolve around two things. These involve creating items or plots and attacking opponents. As a result there rules for creating items / plots which reflect how well concealed the item is. Note it is not clear in the rules how much you should pay for the item. You get a free spy on the least concealed card of two Princesses, which helps you know if someone has a plot against you. The attack is announced to compare on a Princesses virtue and an item that is used in the attack. The defender defends on their virtue and may play any cards to help their defence. They may also get allies to help. The game is more a multiplayer card game with the ability to make your own cards than a role-playing game. Setting (5/20) Like the Win a Royal Heart game there is only a barebones of the setting given in the game to justify what the characters are doing. Indeed the setting is no longer important once you realise what you need to do to win the game. Integration (14/20) The game is pretty integrated to the setting, but given that their really isn’t much in the way of setting all the mechanics definitely give rise to the goal of the game. As a result although it feels integrated I have had to mark this down since the setting is so minimal. Ingredients (18/20) This game has all the ingredients fairly well integrated into the game. The tied mechanic (for item concealment) does a good job of protecting secret plots and the creative equipment is a really good take on integrating this into a game. The game is obviously about a contested succession, although the contest is for the dowry (which is being used in the game as currency. The secret war I’m going to mark down slightly as these warring Princesses may well not be able to hide their contempt for each other and thus the war is not that secret. __________________ Gavin Kenny CodexArcanum review: Pretty Princes Death Dowry Vitenka offers us a game about pretty princesses who have tea parties, gossip, and plot each other's baleful downfall so that they alone can marry the unsuspecting prince, kill him, and use his piles of jewels to pay off their debts. Character Options - 3 A tough call on this category, to be sure. All princesses are essentially the same: 4 stats, 10 monies, "health", spies, and their items. Their are some differences in stats, but ultimately this is a game of player skill at deception and backstabbery. Plus, everyone will be a princess, every time, and have the same motivation. Still, it's a strong premise and it fits the goals of the game, so I have trouble faulting it. Suggestions: None such that would be too great. You suggests that princesses can make up to 3 item cards before play (but still pay for them). I would suggest, instead, that each princess just start with 3 item cards. The Concealment value of them is self-balancing, as is the need for defensive cards. Allow for unlimited inital spying and you've got a pre-game setup that opens the game with everyone sitting on a powder keg. Might also help with your suggested problem of the game taking too long. You might also try adding some kind of skills or traits in. Maybe princesses are very good at getting certain items, and so get a free point of concealment on them, or something like that. The extra power is balanced by the greater chance of rivals making defense cards against such things. I just suggest that for more princess variety, however, and the effects to the core mechanic may be too great to be desirable. Mechanics - 5 Wow, PPDD blew me away with the mechanics. I have to hand it to Vitenka, this game has a really good gameplay mechanic. I won't try to summarize it, but as I read over it I was very impressed with how the game turns the kind of ridiculously complext political plots common to the inspiring stories into a simple game mechanic that let's anyone feel like a Machivelian spy lord. It's a great diplomatic game, wrapped around a simple card mechnanic that brings the RPG/story elements into in via the "flavor" that the item has from the creating player. Suggestions: I really have nothing to add! Anything I suggest might break the wonderful balance that is already here. I think the mechanics here are fascinating, and I really want to play a game to see how they hold up in the real world. I have concerns about the limited amounts of resources, but they may be baseless in actual play. And again, the more I think on it, the more well thought it seems. There could only be 10xPlayers in attack cards ever, but each player can see 10 cards (5 spies with 2 cards each) and thus the game gains another layer of intrigue as you bargain with rivals for their knowledge. Really, great stuff Vitenka. Setting - 2 There's the bare hints of a setting in there, and I give you great credit for the quotes that open each section. That adds a lot of flavor. From the little hints, I gather this is meant to be based on Middle Eastern tropes and images, a nice departure from the typical euro-centric fantasies. Still, bring that setting out! I like the optional rule of letting one player be GM and having them describe the world more, but give the people who play this game something to base it off of. Suggestions: The flavor text is good, and I like setting snippets. Maybe try throwing in some sample item cards, each with a bit of flavor text to really sell the setting. Also, a rules suggestion: make the GM role more regular. I think there's room in this game for a score keeper and interpretter in case a conflict comes up in the rules. Plus, I think the GM role would work well to inflict some randomness onto the game. Each round (after all princesses have gone) the Score Keeper could run an event in the kingdom. That will mix things up a bit and open new opportunities for roleplaying, resource gathering, and so on. Perhaps the winner of each game earns the right to keep Score for the next game, if she wants? Integration - 4 I waver on this score, but I think this is a fair amount. True, the setting is somewhat absent. But what setting is there is almost purely in the brilliant mechanics. This seems like a game where the setting and the story emerge as a consequence of the game, not as a tool to make the game. Conflict drives story instead of story driving conflict, you see? Suggestion: I think this may be the best time to say that I really question if this is a roleplaying game. Certainly roleplaying, a great deal of it even, could come into it. The mechanics themselves, however, encourage a flavorful card game. And nothing is wrong with that. I think there should be room in our gaming lexicon for more mixed games: wargames that use cards, card games that involve flavorful description and roleplaying, and RPGs about big battles or whatever. I hold to my suggestion that a Score/Lore Keeper role who runs events between rounds of conspiracy could add a lot to the RPG element of this game. Ingrediants - 5 Again, I feel halfway torn on the score here, but I think PPDD has the best use of ingrediants I've seen thus far in the contest. Those chosen were: Setting-Tied Mechanic, Creative Equipment, Secret War, Contested Succession, and Dowry. Now, PPDD takes some big liberties with the intepretation of them, but I encouraged that pre-contest and I think the intepretations make for a stronger game here. Also, the ingrediants were put to great use. The mechanics create the setting, and conflict is based entirely around the equipment (which is assigned in a pretty neat way). "Dowry," in this game, is the perfect example of how to use a Phrase-ingrediant to season a game. The dowry is the money spent to buy items (on credit) and it is the prize. Due to the debts, not getting the prize leads to death. At all levels of the game, at all times, "Dowry" is an important concept. Secret War and Contested Succession are both used to influence the setting and the mechanics. Suggestions: None from me, I think this is pretty close to a perfect use of ingrediants. You even took on a 5th extra ingrediant. Such bravado was rewarded in previous Game Chef contests and I think that tradition should find it's way into RPGnet's contests. Well done! Final Thoughts and Suggestions: Pretty Princess Death Dowry is, so far, my ideal entrant for such a contest. Great use of ingrediants, amazing mechanical elements, and it even looks like a fun game to play. My main suggestion is to work on that setting. You even propose a few alternative settings, but I think you should focus in on the one. Throw some examples at us: sample princesses, lots and lots of sample item cards, and example of play! Consider making the Score Keeper a primary role, not just a half-thrown out optional rule. Make GM-less "card game" play the option and flavorful, rich conspiracy roleplaying with a GM the main mode. Overall, this is an amazing effort and you should be very proud. You should be charged with a crime if you don't flesh this all the way out into a real product, I really think it's that good. Final Score - 79/100 -- CodexArcanum