For the scientifically minded - the following is rubbish. But it sounds plausible to those who read "The daily Bus of the news star!"
Big Bus Breaks Bloody Big Barrier!
As something goes faster and faster, it gets heavier - which makes it harder to push. That's what stops everything going faster than light. Scientist Nerdy Boffins (not pictured, too geeky) invented the 'burn stuff' drive - which eats heavy stuff and makes go-faster juice. They put one on a London bus, and told it to eat up the extra 'heavy' made from going really fast. And it went faster than light - which nerdy-boffins assure us is even faster than a cab driver!
This guy (black silhouette with question mark) was driving! Bet he wishes he'd stayed a nerdy boffin now. Drivin' a bus is too blummin hard for them clever blokes!
Shame the bus wasn't blue.
What happens next to those on board is unknowable. What's important is the name of the driver.
Can you get your picture in the tabloids, under that headline?
Each turn, a player plays some or all of their cards. Each card is either played for its movement value, or for its effect. All cards also increment the speed. (Represented by a cartoon speedometer, with very silly speed values)
The game board is a London bus - with some number of rows of seats - which may or may not be occupied by passengers. Passengers are extraordinarily fat - and whilst as many players can fit on a row of seats as they wish, only a single passenger can and will squeeze out the players) There is also the passage going the length of the bus, and a conductor.
Movement points are spent to have the players get out of a row, move up or down the passage and sit down again. They can do some or all of those things in a turn.
Effects can destroy empty rows (burning the mass to go faster) burn fat passengers (burning the mass to go faster) or throw obstacles in the way of the driver.
On their turn, the driver spends cards to avoid the obstacles thrown at them by all players - or risks being ejected and replaced by another player.
The conductor walks up and down at a set rate, and ejects the fat passengers (who, being abstract representations of the mass gained by approaching 'c', lack tickets) and forces standing players to move to the back of the bus. (He'll accept a card as a ticket from a player as a ticket if the player is seated)
Players gain cards according to the current speed of the bus.
When the speed, inevitably, reaches 'c' the player currently driving wins. So gameplay is a bit like 'nim'.
This sounds awesome and silly and awesomely silly! --qqzm
Comments on making it work appreciated, but I'm glad the idea seems as good to me as it di to my sleep drenched brain :) --Vitenka
I need some barriers other than light and sound. --Vitenka
Current think is that the discard pile counts the speed up. Cards are either played for effect (add/subtract passenger/row, add obstacle, do funky player-interaction stuff) or for movement. Driver has to dodge all obstacles in front of the bus, or are sent to the back. There's a waiting list of 'in the driver slot but not the seat' otherwise no-one drives until someone gets to the seat. There should be 'further back of the bus' slots which are mechanically identical to being in the row behind the back of the bus row - but are represented by hanging on to the (back of bus / person in front) for dear life. --Vitenka
Shouldn't the bus get shorter as it gets closer to c (train passing places problem etc)? --SF
Players will be burning rows of seats, so I guess you can interpret it that way. --Vitenka (who thought 'longer' was the more intuitive view)